I started this blog roughly five years ago, but quickly abandoned it for a reason that was, in retrospect, pretty stupid and immature. Now that I've had five years to process and departmentalize those feelings, I guess I'm ready to give it another go.

So how do you recap five years....
Well, here it goes: I changed jobs, we had another son, Daniel changed jobs, started going to a new church, didn't sleep for 2 years, one kiddo started kindergarten, the other is now potty training!!  Loving the present...missing the past...

Like many working moms, I struggle with time management, guilt, isolation, stress, depression...

But cherish the noise, the piles of laundry, the little feet running through my house, involuntarily watching the sun rise every morning....

I've had some people that I love come back into my life and lost others. One in particular that I think about almost daily....I'll never get over losing Dale..too soon was an understatement.

I've discovered I have a passion and heart for adoption. I don't know if my husband and I will ever travel that road, but I'll support anyone that does. Every child should know the love of a family, especially the forgotten little ones...the ones discarded by a society that thinks their lives have no worth. It breaks my heart that any child should live this way...

http://www.newhorizonsforchildren.org/

http://reecesrainbow.org/

My little boy both have severe peanut allergies, so that's been a fun road to walk. It's unreal how dangerous this allergy is and how uneducated the world is about food allergies. Don't get me wrong, I'm not the type of person that thinks everyone should change their behaviors for their child. But I do think that everyone should have a base knowledge of food allergies and never give a parent a hard time for trying to advocate for the safety of their child. A true food allergy is more than just a case of the sniffles. It often times can be life threatening and no two reactions are the same.

My goals for the future now that I'm emerging from the cocoon of toddlerhood?
Well, there is the basics..

• Make good food choices for myself and my family
• Write more (it's always been cathartic for me.. I've started writing short stories again, but will likely never share them...too personal I guess..)
• Teach my boys to be good men in a society that is constantly challenging  them to be selfish and entitled....and function with no moral compass....
• find my spiritually
• get back in the gym and finally accomplish my goal of an unassisted pull up ( I was so close when I quit crossfit...ugh)
• Catch up on all the books I've not read that are piling up beside my bed...

The fun...

• travel and enjoy the fun things of this world...and locally...
• learn to sew..who knew I'd ever want to be domestic!
• reconnect with friends that have unintentionally slipped for my everyday life...

The crazy...

• learn now to not feel guilty when I take time for myself. I was recently told by a very important person from my childhood to take up running. She swore it would give me the peace, clam and serenity I was seeking...plus its hard for sometime to interrupt your "my" time when you are a moving target!
• start an eCommerce business of my own one day?? I'd love to do something involving food allergies (advocating/informing....providing a resource for parents who struggle with what to feed their children in a world full of GMOs)

So, we'll see where the next five years takes me and where I'll end up...as I often say..

I've living the dream....

Walking!!!

Will took his first steps last Thursday. Daniel and I went to pick Will up at day care and they mentioned that he had taken a few steps that morning. One of his teachers held him up to see if he would do it again and he took about 6 steps straight to Daniel!! It was so exciting seeing that up to that point we had not even seen him try to let go and stand on his own. Over the past week we've been encouraging him to take steps and he's getting the hang of it. He's still very unsteady but he can usually get from one person to the other before he falls. We're still trying to capture it on the camera..but it is kind of hard to film it while he's heading your way. Maybe in the next few weeks, when he gets a little more stable, we'll be able to capture his little walk.

Summer here we come...

Not too much is going on this week with Will. The family is just trying to finish up the school year and Will is along for the ride. Will still isn't walking, but he is making huge strides elsewhere. He now has all four molars, which brings his tooth count to 12. He has started to play ball with us, both rolling and "throwing (and by throwing I mean he picks the ball up and holds it over his head and then lets go of it with an attempt at direction..that is a toss to me." He has become very interested in putting things in and out of containers, playing with his cars and role playing with his animals. (Well, as much roll playing as a one year old can accomplish that is... he moves them around and puts them in and out of cars, his airplane and his mailbox.)

He continues to toddle after his race car and is moving very well. It is very funny to watch him walk behind that toy. Once he finds his balance, he'll be walking with no problem.

Other than that, the only other thing to report is that Will was bitten again at day care. This is the second time in three weeks and we're pretty angry about it. To the day care's credit, they are taking the appropriate steps, but I just wish they were doing a little more on the prevention side of things. They refer to this child as the "biter" but at this point there is not a serious effort being made to keep them separated. It is the oldest vs. the youngest..the largest child vs. the smallest and I feel that they could be doing a little more to prevent this from happening. They have put two reprimands in child's file and talked to his parents..again. We have also been told by his teachers that if it happens a third time they parents will be called in and there is a possibility the child will be removed from the day care. I don't wish to necessarily have the child removed, but there needs to be something done to stop this behavior. If the biter is the child I beleive it is, he is almost two. That is developmentally old enough to understand that biting is not an acceptable behavior. Thankfully the skin was not pierced and the tough boy is doing fine.

Now that Summer is basically here, we're should have more things to report..seeing that we'll actually have some time to do some fun activities. Coming up....Will vs. the water table toy.

Gatlinburg

Last weekend, my mom and I took Will up to Gatlinburg, TN. My mom has never really been up to the mountains, so we decided that Gatlinburg would be the place to go for our mini vacation. Will was a very good traveler! It was a short trip, but we packed in the activities. We of course went shopping, at at the Apple Barn (twice), walked the strip, and went to the Mirror Maze. We weren't sure about the Mirror Maze at first. We knew it would be horrible or realy cool! Thankfully it was the latter. We wasn't quite sure what to think of the music and flashing lights at first, but the further we went the more he enjoyed it. By the end he was dancing in his stroller and smiling from ear to ear! He also drank from a straw for the first time on the trip!
Enjoy the pics!

First Word!!

Will said his first word this morning!!! He was sitting in his high chair eating breakfast and when Daniel entered the room, Will looked at him across the room and said "Da Da." He's been saying the syllables for months, but this was the first time he said it with purpose! Exciting times :) He's been working on the mmmm sound so maybe I'm next. :)

Day Two in the New Room

The ladies in the new room at day care were more welcoming and attentive towards William upon our arrival today. I was glad to see that and hope it continues. I still don't feel the same connection with the teachers in this room, but I'm sure it will take some time. I was pleased to read on his daily summary sheet that they are working on baby sign language with him. Daniel and I have been trying to do the signs with Will, but without it being reinforced during the day, we weren't making much progress. I hope to see that change in the next few weeks. In honor of Cinco de Mayo they also read some Spanish books to the kids and sang some Spanish songs...lol. At least they didn't give them their milk in baby margarita glasses.

After day care, we went to visit Daniel at school. He is in the middle of leadership training with the kids this week and isn't getting home until about 10 pm. Will enjoyed seeing his dad, all the kids and being passed around to all the adults. Afterwords we came home, played with some toys, had a bottle and took a bath. Then it was off to bed for Will. He continues to do well with his sleep training and only cried for about two minutes before falling asleep.

New foods for the day: Chicken Salad Sandwich, Cucumbers and tomatoes...yum!

1 Year Appointment

William had his one year appointment with the pediatrician today. According to the doctor he is doing very well. He was 21 lbs (25% percentile) and 29 1/2" (50th percentile). He's been looking a little chubby lately, so I was glad to see that he wasn't overweight:) He's doing great! The doctor said we can go ahead and try the dairy products. He said most babies outgrow the dairy allergy, but we need to watch him carefully over the next few weeks to make sure he's tolerating it. Even if we have to keep him on soy products, I'm just glad to see a end coming to the formula train!

Will is developing an overbite from the passy, so we'll be giving that to the passy fairy this week. I'm not sure if we'll go cold turkey or try and ween him. We've already been decreasing his dependence on it, but we'll have to speed up that process. I guess braces are in his future :(

He also has until he is 15 months old to start walking...so we have 3 months to get the boy on his feet. After that, they start testing to see if there is a problem. Personally I just think he prefers to be carried around. He was a late crawler, I would expect that he would also be a late walker.
Someone told me that the earlier they get their teeth the later they walk, so far that is proving itself to be correct.

The shocker of the visit was that he has a double ear infection!!! He's shown no symptoms this time. I was amazed. Given his history with ear infections and antibiotics, the doctor did give us an oral antibiotic but warned me that it may not work and we may have to progress to the antibiotic shot. We'll go by and have his chiropractor give his ears a tug this week and see if that, in tangent with the antibiotics will take care of the problem. I'm really not wanting to give him the shot.

Will did have the Pneumococcal vaccine booster today, but that was it. I did not allow them to give the Chicken Pox or MMR vaccines. I know that we will not give him the Chicken Pox vaccine, but I'm still up in the air about MMR. At the very least, I'll be putting that one off as long as possible....probably until he starts kindergarden. He has his next appointment at 15 months and I believe we are now done with all of the shots that we've agreed to give him with the exception of a few boosters at age 2 and 4. YEAH!

After the appointment, I dropped Will off at daycare. He is now out of the infant room and started in his new room today. I have to say, we absolutely loved the ladies in the infant room and I am going to miss them greatly! I let the new teachers know he would be late today due to his appointment and they said that would be fine. When I entered the new room I was basically ignored. It really ticked me off. I know they were cleaning up from lunch, but when you see me standing by the door with my arms full, obviously not really knowing what I should do with my son in this new room, maybe you should give me some direction! I finally had to say "where should I put him?" before one of them came and got him from me and put him in the bucket seat at the lunch table. After taking him, the lady just went back to what she was doing and didn't really say anything else to me except asking if he could have juice. I again had to ask if there was anything else I needed to for Will before I left. It just wasn't the warm welcoming environment I have been accustomed to in the infant room and for the first time since we began taking Will there, I wanted to cry when I left. The ladies in the infant room were always busy feeding this baby, changing that baby, rocking this one, playing with that one, but every single one always greeted us when we walked in the door and seemed glad to see us. Hopefully it will be better this afternoon when I pick him up. Maybe I just caught them at a bad time. I've heard good things about this new room, but I definately didn't see it today.